Hey there!
Both of them were going to leave early.
The ENFP had promised someone an hour. They meant it. But they had also said yes to three other things that night.
The INFJ had an exit planned before they arrived. They always do.
It's now 1am. They're in a comfortable couch at a house party. Someone's shoes came off at some point.
These two as a pair get written about more than almost any other. Not because they scored well on a compatibility chart. Because of what can happen in the first few minutes.
And to be fair, they do have plenty in common. They're both drawn to meaning over appearances. They drift naturally toward conversations that matter. Both have an uncanny ability to turn "How do you know the host?" into "What are you doing with your life?
Here's the thing they have in common that isn’t a personality trait. It's that both of them get misread constantly, in opposite directions.
The INFJ gets read as intense. Distant. A lot of work. People decide there's something deep in there and then never ask what it is.
The ENFP gets read as fun. Easy. The bright one. Nobody asks what's underneath, because everyone's quietly decided there’s nothing deeper to find.
Two opposite misreadings. Same result. Half-understood, permanently, by nearly everyone.
And then, four minutes into a conversation by a fridge, somebody gets it right.
ENFP ⚡ | INFJ 👁 |
|---|---|
Electricity | Still water |
Thinks out loud to find out what they think | Already knows. Deciding whether to say it. |
Often needs someone in the room | Often needs the empty room |
Sees a thousand paths and wants to explore all of them | Sees one path clearly and walks it with conviction |
Tells you. Often. | Shows you. Never mentions it. |
Nothing about that list is compatible. And that's not the point.
One of them goes out and brings back the world. The other goes in and brings back the meaning. Put them together and nothing gets missed, including each other.
Sometimes the rarest feeling isn't chemistry.
It's recognition.
Maybe that's why neither of them leaves early after all.
— Ru
the16types
From the feed
Here’s what it is:
A conversation with ENFP and INFJ:
@the16types Oooooh somebody has a crush on someone 👇👇👇 #ENFP #INFJ #16personalities #mbti
Coming Soon (update)
In case you missed it → I’m writing a book for every personality type. One by one. That’s completely nuts, right? I guess it is. Book One is coming in September!
The mission: to give every single one of you a field manual to yourself. One that you can also share with your loved ones. And better yet, you’ll have the manual on them too!
WEEKLY UPDATE:
Second print proofs are in. The glossy finishing is much better than the matte touch. And after seeing all different versions, I have to say that I’m now preferring cream paper over white. If you (dis)agree, reply to this email, because in the end, I’m writing the book for you ;-)
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